The whole idea of putting yourself out there can seem mentally and physically draining, especially as we enter year 3 of the pandemic. But that’s where the beauty of online dating comes in, cue: eye rolls! It can actually be fun and the best part is, it puts you in the driver’s seat. So here’s how to help you really own dating in the new year. Think of it as a handy little dating handbook for 2022.
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You don’t need to take it too seriously, but just seriously enough
Well, serious enough to understand that you do need to date to find love. Swearing off dating in the new year probably isn’t the best idea. Prioritising time and energy for this is an important step.
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Over-texting can kill a first date
There’s a difference between texting to see if you vibe with the person and texting too much. It’s important to leave room for conversation on the first date and give each other the chance to make an unbiased first impression when you actually meet.
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It’s not needy to tell someone what you need
It’s so common to be afraid to express your expectations and needs, especially in a (potential) new partner. But this fear is really being afraid of what their answer may be. If what you’re expecting isn’t unreasonable, if the other person can do it then great but if not, then at least you know and can make a clearer decision of what you would want to do next.
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You shouldn’t leave dating upto fate
Or ‘when the time is right’, ‘coz the time is now. If you want to find companionship or even get married and have children, or simply find the love of your life, there really is no better time than now to grab the bull by the horns and shake up your dating life.
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Be realistic
Dating does take some time and effort on your part. It does come with disappointment and having to kiss a few frogs before finding the right person sometimes, we guess you got to get through it to get to it.
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You can always continue to dinner if you want
When you set up a first date, it could be a better idea to meet for coffee, a walk or drinks. This way, you can make a quicker exit if you aren’t enjoying yourself. But if you’re having a great time with the other person, you can always stay longer and have dinner together, rather than being stuck through an entire meal when you can’t stand the person. You’re welcome 😉
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Having mutual interests is amazing
Nope, you don’t have to be exactly the same ofcourse – how boring would that be?! But closeness comes from having some similar views and interests. It’s like finding someone you can be best friends with along with the bonus of sex and marriage (if that’s what you’re looking for).
Why do you think we keep harping on about compatibility?! Because it’s that happy medium between similarities and differences that make for a connection that doesn’t get old!
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And no, you really don’t want to sleep with everyone you date
That will always lead to emotional attachment for at least one of you, which will definitely get in the way of dating smarter!
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Which brings us to attachment
It could be smarter to date while keeping your options open, initially at least. It will help you move ahead in the world of dating instead of giving all your emotional energy to one person who may not even want to settle down. Try leaving your emotions at the door till you get to know the other person for some time at least.
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It takes time…
Just like all good things! You really can’t put a timeline on great love, age, society and annoying relatives can go to hell.
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Just go with it
A positive mindset (embodying the above can help with this) can really help you feel empowered and confident. Love yourself, be comfortable with what you’re looking for and who you are, that energy automatically attracts the right people. Just remember to have fun and enjoy it too.
